MicroHorror

December 25, 2008

The Bemoaned Dignitaries

In memory of Edward Gorey (Sorry I can’t draw).

Arnold’s last words were: Antifreeze is syrupy and sweet.
Beatrice’s last words were: Bees! Bees! Bees!
Clay’s last words were: Cold… but they’ll find me.
Drake’s last words were: Don’t pull that lever.
Eileen’s last words were: Elephants are frightened far too easily.
Fredericka’s last words were: Fingers!? Where are my fingers?
George’s last words were: God, oh God.
Hildy’s last words were: How did the duck pull the trigger?
Ingrid’s last words were: I am not loved.
John’s last words were: Joking… please, please I swear I was only joking.
Kendrick’s last words were: Killed on my birthday; just my luck.
Liam’s last words were: Let me lick that.
Mona’s last words were: My head hurts.
Nathaniel’s last words were: Nobody knew me.
Oswald’s last words were: One last drink won’t kill me.
Philip’s last words were: Perhaps I am too reckless.
Quentin’s last words were: Quiet at last.
Rosalind’s last words were: Roses are red and now I am dead.
Sylvia’s last words were: Such a wasted life.
Trent’s last words were: That was unexpected.
Umberto’s last words were: Under here the seeker will never find me hiding.
Vincent’s last words were: Very funny.
Winifred’s last words were: Why didn’t I ever travel?
Xandra’s last words were: X-rays probably shouldn’t be this painful.
Yvonne’s last words were: You don’t have the guts!
Zachariah’s last words were: Zoos usually have the animals locked in, don’t they?

2 Comments »

  1. Wow. Get me laughing then slap my face. Hiding the really poignant ones between sillier phrases really increases their impact.

    Comment by Adrian Ludens — January 10, 2009 @ 2:26 am

  2. I’m sure Mr. Gorey would approve! Well done :)

    Comment by Inxtcy — October 25, 2011 @ 10:28 am

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