The Big, Bad C-Word
The last thing you see is a flash of white as the man’s coat sleeve brushes over your face. He is saying something, but it is difficult to make out his words over the clanging din of the machines to your left and your right.
You thought nothing could get worse and then it did.
The mesh wire mask was warm, heated so it would be more pliable, when a pair of hands pressed it down onto your face. The heat and pressure felt almost comforting at first, until you could feel tiny circles of skin being pushed up between the circled spaces created by the mesh. It has made a mask, one of metal, which has cooled and hardened, perfectly matching your features.
It is this mask that has been placed back over your face, the sides bolted to the table. If the cold, hard table you are laying on does not make you uncomfortable, then the immobility will. You cannot turn your head, nor lift yourself up. You have full control of your limbs, though the thought does nothing to placate your nerves or calm that growing pit in your stomach. You would sit up, slide sideways off this table, if you could only move your head.
A woman walks into the room. At least you think it is a woman, judging by the clack of heeled shoes on linoleum and the hand that touches yours. All you can see is her arm–another white-clad arm–but this one is smaller, more slender and delicate than the first. She works quickly, buckling padded leather restraints on your wrists; then she moves to your ankles.
Once you are strapped down completely, she tugs on the shackles to make sure they will hold. They do.
In an act of almost pure instinct, you begin to push against the leather strips that are holding you back. You don’t get far.
Now the panic within your belly is rising. It is hot and burning and thick as it comes up your throat and coats your mouth. Your heart is beating quickly, almost out of time with anything else, and you feel all at once heavy and light-headed, as if you might float right off the table, high above this place, and then plummet back down to earth.
You close your eyes and tell yourself to take a few deep breaths. Now is not the time to lose your grip on reality.
The metal mask is feeling wet, humid from your hot breath or maybe moist from your sweat. You can feel a drop of sweat forming between your eyes. It is growing corpulent and slowly begins to slide down the bridge of your nose. It itches, and you try to turn your head just an inch, just a centimeter, to dislodge it and maybe find relief, but you cannot.
The lights in the room go out, and you know it is about to begin.
